What Year Is It, Again?
Caller: Hello! I'm from the Boston Globe, and we are running a special on our---
Redpanda: I'm going to stop you right there. Someone actually called last night, too. It's my fiance's subscription, and he isn't here right now...
Caller: Yes, but the upcoming weeks are going to have so many coupons! You will need those for all your holiday shopping!
Redpanda: Sorry, I think coupons are stupid. He is the one who likes 'em. I prefer to spend my time reading The Wall Street Journal, bringing home the bacon, and frequenting titty bars. Gotta go!